Chick Code

A few examples of the kind of female-female solidarity I only saw in the 90s and rarely since

If another female is crying, offer support, we know those aren't crocodile tears
"Can I have a pad/tampon"? The answer is yes. Try to carry these on you so you can help a fellow lady in need. Same deal with painkillers.
Random mood swing or feeling bitchy out of nowhere, and among women? Have a little leniency. Could be PMS.
"Can you watch my kid for a minute?" The answer is yes. Pretty much no one would do this for no reason.
"Can I have a hug?" Yes, queen. Absolutely.
Women and nonbinary genders defend the innocent and the weak. That is just what we do.
Those among us who hurt the innocent or the weak are canceled, justifiably. Even in the 90s TERFs and gay-bashers were seriously, seriously uncool among ladies and the gender nonconforming. I mean, there was a gay friend on Sex and the City? Like, even popular media was like "get that gay bashing shit out of here"
Female friendships? Think Troi and Crusher, not Mean Girls. In fact there's this particular episode of TNG, Conundrum, where Riker gets his tomfoolery thrown back at him by Troi and Ro Laren that pretty much exemplifies the early 90s chick code. Heh.
It is okay to be vulnerable! It is okay to be gentle! It is okay to be nice! Being innocent is fine too! We allow that!
People might mock the female and other-gendered for cooking, cleaning, keeping house, and so on. Fine, guess they'll never know how good we are at it. It'll be our secret. Dry toast or being left out for them... souffle for us.
Always take any excuse to party or otherwise have a good time. Yes, girls really do just want to have fun
Going to the bathroom in groups means that we can discuss what we can't discuss with the rest of the world, in said bathroom
What is discussed in the bathroom stays in the bathroom
A pint of favorite ice cream and a TV show or movie binge in the worst-looking clothing owned is not a trope. It is therapy. It is understood, it is known.
A woman's or gender-nonconforming-person's attire is not to be judged but admired, appreciated, and discussed with respect
Women go to college to get more knowledge, men go to jupiter to get more stupider. Education for the ladies! Yes!
Bitching about men amongst ladies and the non-gender-conforming is fine, as long as no one's feelings get hurt and everyone knows you're just kidding about the men's idiocy. Unless there is one particular specimen who turned out to really be dumb as a brick and a total fuck-up, and then we laugh at him.
If it's evident that a female or gender-nonconforming friend is getting their heart broken, you let them lean on you and you don't turn your back on them. Ever.
Unquestioned loyalty between relatively innocent people was a thing. Betrayal and treachery used to be relatively uncommon or at least not damn near inevitable among female-female and female-gender-nonconforming friendships. Now instead of being the exception it's... the norm. I know I'm not the only one who sometimes wants to turn back time, but... damn. Hopefully younger generations are wiser.
Kindness is not taken as weakness or an opportunity for social climbing! It is appreciated!
Having an opinion, having your own brain and your own thought process, being individual and thinking for yourself, and being unique is not an "attitude problem," it is being sassy or being yourself and that is respected
Most of us used to value kids and be kind to kids? Plus support and encourage that kind of behavior in other ladies and gender nonconforming people? What the hell happened?!
We used to have chillin like a villain mastered, and new people to join in the lounge chairs, or in the pool, or playing sports? Cool. Now it's always hustle hustle hustle. Pointless.
Women are not divided into Feminists and non-Feminists. Women are women are women; back in the day to the best of my knowledge they didn't treat each other with a different set of rules for believing in Feminism or not. In fact it was tacitly understood that women had an alliance of sorts. That said, non-gender-conforming folks weren't really that accepted til the 90s and we still have a hard time. Eh, it is what it is.
Probably the number one thing is that usually a woman or non-gender-conforming person will put themselves out there and go out of the way to do something kind and compassionate, and chauvinistic men will sneer at them and absolutely dump on them for it, calling them weak and stupid and unambitious and all manner of other things. Cause it's supposedly bad to not be rough and tough (aka an absolute fucking asshole) all the time, etc. Well, back in the day, other women didn't also sneer at them for it. They just understood.
Listening to one another is just as valuable as speaking
Once upon a time, between a choice of strangers, a woman could trust another woman more than she could trust a man. Some people still believe this works. Well... not in my experience. Will be asking all the women I know, to see what they say.
Big serious time? Reserved for whenever it's unavoidable. Silly, frivolous, fun, ridiculous, light-hearted? Whenever possible. Huh, I can remember a time when being feminine meant being happy. All serious all the time? We left that to the suits. I am so not kidding, gatherings among women used to look like the pages of the old Mad Magazine, back when Mad Magazine was good. You didn't think all women were humorless dried-up Feminazis, did you? Go read the Sweet Potato Queens and get back to me.

Hindsight Is 2022